Mr. Mom

It's noon on Monday and our family's routine is in full force as if March break never existed.  Truth be told we were fortunate enough to spend a great break away at a lodge just north of here with my parents.  Check them out and give them some business.

But being that it's Monday now, in some ways it's like that week of respite never existed.  At least it seems like a distant memory as Evan is back in school, Jonah eats his lunch, and Zoe is starting to stir from her nap.  I've had the unique opportunity to occupy a different space the last few weeks in our family as I've been Mr. Mom to these guys.  As many know, three weeks ago I left my position at St. Stephen's University and while I'm looking forward to starting a new position fairly soon (more details soon) the waiting period has demanded that I look after the kids during the day.  It's been an interesting time as it's both been wonderful to be with them more yet challenging as my own patience and capabilities as a parent have been tested.

First of all let me say that I appreciate my wife and the gift she has for balancing a full-time job plus looking after the kids (and me of course) the way she does.  I will never match her abilities in this area.  In her heart of hearts I know she wishes it were her that got to stay home with the kids more but our financial situation and other things demand that she does what she does.

As I've said I love this time with them.  I love watching them play and interact.  I stink at cooking but I love making their lunches (usually with a phone call to Sarah for help) and I even don't mind the dirty diaper challenge.  What I wrestle with is the ability to stay present and give them my full attention.  There's always something else I'd rather be doing and I find myself there far too often.  It's a bit of a guilt thing that I know is partially my own personality challenge and partially the expectation I feel to be doing something productive--which is wrong in itself as that implies that I don't think child care responsibilities are productive.  An example from today is that Jonah really wants to play with me.  Nothing specific, he just wants me to spend time with him.  I've put him off for the morning with a promise of some time spent this afternoon but I as I sit here now and watch him eat I wonder what I did this morning that was so important?

Speaking of..lunch is done.